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Thursday, December 29th, 2005
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10:14 pm - An update on things
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I have completely failed at finishing the "novel." In part, it's because so many things have been happening as of late. My girlfriend left for a little while. I had feared that she had left forever, but I got a fantastic surprise for Christmas. I had consigned myself to be alone without her, but she came to the party and everything was pretty much set right again. I'm really glad that she was able to look past my, well, past. I mean, I'm not the same person I was back then so everything should be different. Learn from my mistakes, etc.
Either way, I'm really glad she's back and I'm going to do everything I can to make her happy.
Oh, and a friend of mine is pregnant which is really weird because we're not sure how it happened. Other than that, things seem to be back to normal... ish.
current mood:  ecstatic
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| Monday, November 7th, 2005
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6:32 pm - Not a part of the story
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I think I kind of like this live journal thing. I might use it for more than the story. I guess, well, if people have any questions for me, they can ask. Although any "flames" will be hunted down. The general populace doesn't believe in vampires so they won't be looking for me.
I've also been informed that I should use an "lj cut" for my story since it's long. I'll see if I can figure it out, and I'll give it a try.
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| Sunday, November 6th, 2005
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2:07 pm
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Chapter One, Part One
As I mentioned in the prologue, I was born in the year 1756. Since it was not uncommon for young children to die, the exact dates were rarely recorded nor the days celebrated. I was aware of the approximate season so I generally tell people that I was born on May 12th. Supposedly this makes me a Taurus and is "very appropriate" as some have told me.
My father had married my mother after his first wife died in child birth. My mother was referred to as a saint in that she was able to put up with my father's gruff personality. She passed away when I was three. I do not remember much about her.
My sisters remained aloof in most cases. They were all a bit older than me and were busy with their own lives, many of them already married and moved away. I think they may have left as soon as they could to get away from my father.
Without a female presence in the house, other than servants, I was left to be raised by my father. He was not interested much in raising a child, even if I was his only son. He always seemed to give off the impression that I was a disappointment. I did everything I could to please him, to be the best man I could be. It was never enough, of course. He was a perfectionist, hard, and stubborn.
In one instance, I had fallen out of a tree while trying to keep a look out for visitors we were expecting. I had figured that I would have been doing him a favor. I broke both my legs in the process. When he found me, instead of caring for me, he scolded me for being so stupid as to put myself in harm's way. Now he had to find me rather than tend to his guests. He promptly turned away and left me to crawl my way back toward the house until he decided to tell the servants where to find me. It took quite a while for my legs to heal and I was bed-ridden for several weeks. My father never visited me once.
When I was old enough, I was sent away to boarding school where I learned what I could about finances and business. I made a few friends while I was there, but I remained by myself most of the time.
It wasn't until I returned back home that I was able to make a connection with a person.
Her name was Mary Cameron.
Upon my return home, my father decided to throw a get-together in order to show me off as if he had some sort of pride in my accomplishment. Mary and her parents were invited to the party. She was their favorite child, and they were rather possessive of her. She was well beyond the normal age for marriage because of this. However, this did not change my feelings for her.
Everything about her seemed to sing and glow. Her fair skin and auburn hair shined even when the light was dim. She practically floated across the room and was always ready with a smile. She really was a prize and it was no wonder why her parents so loathed to have her leave their home.
But for whatever reason, she was attracted to me. It was a smart match, the two of us, but apparently she fell in love with me as I fell in love with her. It was almost a painful, aching love. After some time, her parents agreed to let her marry me. I almost wish now that they hadn't.
The day itself was amazing. She wore her favorite blue dress, her hair done up in flowers. The sun was out and the sky was an amazing shade of blue. It was quite unusual for the season and area. How fitting that our marriage would begin on a beautiful day and would end so terribly. The birds may have well been singing our funeral dirge.
We had been happy for quite some time, although I was not used to such a thing. But even with her caring patience, I felt haunted. It may have been her caring that was the source of it all, not that I can blame her for my insecurities. I was so enamored with her that I feared loosing her. She was my entire world, and I knew that if she were to die, I would be devastated. I lived with this fear for quite some time.
After a point, the fear grew to such an extent that it nearly consumed me. I had inherited my father's farm and small trading business after he stubbornly died. He was not one to give in to anything, and death was no exception. After fighting illness for many years, he finally found a battle he could not win.
The beginning of the end began around 1786. I was around thirty years old. My wife Mary and I had been married for a few years at this point. She was twenty-six, and we still had not had any children. I think maybe things would have been different if we had been able to have them. Maybe things would have taken a different turn.
I had decided to expand the trading business to create a greater income, as well as afford me a chance to travel although I loathed to leave Mary. I saw this as an opportunity to find a way to keep her for as long as I could, hopefully forever.
I searched while I travelled. If I heard of anyone that might have some knowledge about how to keep someone alive forever, I wanted to talk to them. I spoke with some odd characters along the way, but none of them could help me. There were actually some that did their best to convince me that I didn't want to live forever. I had brushed them off; surely it was better to live forever?
While on one trip to Edinburg in 1789, I heard of a lady of the night that did not seem to age. I talked to one older man who said that all the years that he had been visiting her, she had not changed in the least. I decided she deserved a visit, although most definitely not to partake of her wares. I would never have debased the sanctity of my marriage to my beloved Mary by doing so. I only went to discover the truth of what I had been told.
Her "home" was in an unsavory part of the city. She ran a small brothel which housed both vampires and humans alike. She apparently found this employment to be an advantage to her kind. She was able to feed at her leisure with out gaining too much attention.
When I first met her, she had just finished feeding off of one client. I paused to talk to him as he stumbled out the door. He said that he had been coming to the place for a good five years, and the woman had remained the same for that entire time when most women in her line of work aged very quickly.
She laid out on the floor. The entire room was done up in reds and other deep colors. Pillows and curtains gave the place a comfortable feel, but I felt myself to be on edge. She was definitely a foreign woman; I'd say now she was from the Middle East. Despite that, she spoke with a French accent when she gave me a name that was English: Jenna.
I talked to her for a while. She was not very forth coming about what she was and what that meant. She did her best to try and seduce me. I think she saw me as a challenge. I was very tempted to just up and leave, but then she did something to convince me to believe her. She took a knife and plunged it into her stomach. I cried out in terror, but she seemed to care not for what she had done. She removed the knife and cleaned it off. Her wound soon stopped bleeding and began to heal right before my eyes.
At this point, I would have done anything in order to learn how she came to be what she was. She informed me by demonstrating on me. She took me by the back of the neck, pulling my head back and exposing my pulsing veins. Her mouth touched my neck as if in a kiss, but she opened her maw and clamped down. I could feel her fangs puncture my skin as they slid into my veins. I nearly yelled out in pain but she covered my mouth with her hand.
Th blood seemed to just pour out of my body as she sucked up all that she could. I could feel my life drain away. I began to panic as I felt myself dying. She finally stopped, and I collapsed to the floor. I thought to myself how stupid I must be to have trusted her and now my body would be found in a brothel. My wife, who did not know that I was trying everything I could to save her, would instead believe that I had been unfaithful.
But now, something I did not expect happened. Jenna bit her own wrist and let the blood drip into my mouth. It was like electric hitting my tongue. A new fire ran it's course through my veins as the other life drained out of them. I felt as if I was burning throughout my body, from the inside out. I seethed on the floor, and Jenna stopped the blood flow to me. I nearly jumped up and grabbed her wrist for more blood, but she stopped me with a hard push.
I landed on the floor and began to shake, over come with a strange feeling of cold. To my horror, I realized that my heart had stopped beating. I looked to Jenna with fear in my eyes.
"Did you believe that you could stay in this world forever and still be alive? It is a trade-off. To have life but not really be alive." She turned away from me. "You have much to learn, but for now, take a rest."
I curled up around myself, searching for a warmth inside me that was no longer there.
current mood:  apathetic
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| Saturday, November 5th, 2005
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9:25 am
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Prologue
I'm starting this on the advice of a friend. In part, I really don't want to do this. It seems to be too much to let out to everyone, but she convinced me that it would help. She also suggested that I do it this month, to some how be a part of this "National Novel Writing Month." I think it might make the story seem a little trivial, but I suppose that now is no better a time than any other time. I guess I would prefer to do it later than sooner, but I'm sure that I'll be nagged to death if I don't do it. 50,000 words in, now, 25 days? I'm sure that I have enough material, but maybe I should change those numbers into the words to take up more of the word count. Then maybe I can leave some parts of my life out.
I suppose that this is the part that I can introduce myself to all the strangers out there reading this. I would like to take a moment to say that you are all voyeurs.
My name is Thomas MacDonald. I was born around May 12th, 1756 in Scotland. I am a vampire.
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